There seems to be a North American workplace construct that forces us to think it’s natural to be ‘someone’ at work and ‘someone’ at home. I’ve seen it in countless professionals and leaders of all kinds (e.g. Lawyers, Doctor’s, Business Owners, etc.) – I am also guilty of this myself. Why have we adopted this pattern? Hard to say. Perhaps it’s due to an underlying fear of true transparency, or maybe it’s the ultimate dichotomy of the digital age – the expectation of privacy in our personal lives.
This type of ‘dual persona’ is not uncommon for HR professionals. For example, we (in HR) are encouraged in schooling and mentorship to not get “too close” to employees to avoid conflicts of interest. That alone limits our ability to connect with others in the workplace on certain subject matter. In doing so, we’ve isolated ourselves from developing a deeper connection with the workforce we represent.
I don’t know about anyone else – but trying to balance this whole two persona thing is hard work, not to mention exhausting! I wouldn’t expect an employee to walk in to work every day acting differently from what they do with their family and friends. So why the heck are we, as HR professionals, so scared of allowing our true selves to be open at work and building meaningful connections with employees?
To all of you HR professionals out there reading this, I ask you:
- Why is humanizing ourselves and showing our true authentic selves in the workplace so taboo?
- Why do we feel the need to place a wall between us and the employees who work at our organizations?
- When did it become acceptable for us to neglect blatantly being “human” in our profession?
Does this whole concept not seem a bit ironic? We’re ‘human’ resource professionals yet in most cases employees view us as far from human. Don’t get me wrong, we’ve all been there in our HR Careers – we’d rather not build the connection in the event that we may have to fire someone. From time to time you establish a good rapport with a select few employees only to have them turn around and make comments like, “oh- I better not say that the ‘HR (lady/guy/person/robot) is here…” (Probably one of my favorites…)
As an HR professional I sometimes feel like employees see me in this one little box – ‘the HR person.’ To a degree they are right, I am an HR professional, but my identity and who I am as a person is more than just that. I like to compare this to the elementary or middle school experience of seeing your teacher out in public for the first time. Up until that moment, you could have sworn they lived at the school and slept on those massive high jump mats and never left the vicinity. Turns out your teacher actually had a life (maybe a husband, a kid or two, or just cats). If you haven’t already guessed where I’m heading with this yet – yes folks, HR professionals have lives too! So why do we (HR professionals) insist on keeping this part of ourselves away from the workplace?
It hasn’t been until recently that I’ve been asked to break this concept down in my current role at Fibernetics. At Fibernetics, our purpose is to deliver happiness and connections every day by being awesome. With this company purpose in mind, we do Human Culture differently (what we call Human Resources). We’re an innovative company that is progressive in the way we treat our employees and are becoming recognized Nationally, Provincially and locally for our practices. We, as a team, build connections with our employees every day. We take the time to chat, learn and listen to what they have to say. Keep in mind that this does not mean we’re only talking and listening about work concerns. We get to know who our employees are, how their families are and even some of life’s trials and tribulations. We try our best to demonstrate a genuine spirit of community within the workplace that, in turn, our employees emulate as well. This sense of community and culture transformation at Fibernetics is a passion of our President, John Stix.
To be honest, when John sat us down as a team and encouraged us to break down the ‘HR’ walls and build connections I was uncomfortable at first. This whole concept made me feel quite vulnerable. I had never had to do this before and if anything, had never been encouraged to share my personal life and build ‘meaningful’ (key word) connections with employees. It was quite the opposite.
During this meeting with John, it prompted me to revisit a conversation that an HR superior once had with me before I worked at Fibernetics. The superior told me that he had never hired someone “with such an online presence” before and that it might be a good idea for me to consider taking down my YouTube and Music Channels. This recommendation was framed as a way for me to avoid anything that could be “used against me” when it came to the political playground I was going to be exposed to in my HR role at the time.
As a young, impressionable HR professional I took what he said to heart. I went home that evening deleted almost everything music related, changed my name on Facebook to what I like to call “typical teacher” (First Name, Middle Name – good luck creeping me – sort of Facebook name).
Little did I know at the time, these moves that I considered to be “grown-up” and “professional” would in turn be a contributing factor to not enjoying my role. There was this constant feeling that I was ‘hiding’ something about myself that I wasn’t allowed to share.
Why would something like that make me miserable? To sum it up – music to me is like breathing, and it has been that way since I was five years old. Deleting my music was like deleting a part of my authentic self. That in itself was detrimental to who I was as a person and my own ability to feel comfortable in my own skin while at work. Yes, I could have not listened to my former superior and his opinion of my online music presence. That said, I would not have learned the lesson of how rewarding and free it is to not feel like I’m hiding who I am at my core in the workplace.
Since working at Fibernetics, I can openly tell each and every one of you that my physical, as well as mental health and well-being, have improved significantly. There are enough psychological workplace studies out there to support improvements in employee well-being with supportive workplace cultures. The distinctive culture we have here at Fibernetics is an attributing factor to my self-improvement and my new ability to demonstrate my true authentic self in the workplace. I no longer feel as if I am ‘hiding’ who I am, or my musical background for that matter.
As I started out in my HR career, I always said that I wanted to work for a company that cares as much about its people as it does for the product/commodity they produce. I didn’t think that such a concept would be as difficult to find as what I first encountered. That said, I am grateful to be able to say that I have found such a place in Fibernetics.
It has been an amazing experience thus far to work for a company where I do not need to feel intimidated about emulating my true authentic self. I have gained a greater professional perspective on the importance of culture and how the culture of an organization can have a direct impact on employee health and well-being. Building relationships and connections with employees is truly a rewarding experience. Without these connections, the Fibernetics culture would not be what it is. As an entire ecosystem, we as individuals interact and grow with one another each and every day. The connections we share with one another thrive and make us closer and stronger as a team and in turn make the business stronger too. That in itself is what’s quickly made us one of the most sought after organizations to work for in Waterloo region.
As a culture guru in training, I encourage all Fibernetics employees and HR professionals to break down your personal walls that have hindered you in the past from demonstrating your true authentic self at work. Speaking from experience, you’ll be pleasantly surprised with the self-improvements, as well as the improvements in your surroundings. And employee’s – don’t forget – us folks in HR are people too! Don’t be shy around us, feel free to share, cry and laugh with us. We like hearing how you are doing, the bad and the good. We are here for you, and we care!
Here’s to finding your true authentic self in the workplace – enjoy the journey!